A year in the life of a 4-year-old (and her mom)
Jan. 5: For those of you playing "Weird stuff Callie does in the morning" bingo, if you had "Screaming 'abba-cababra' for half an hour straight," you can go ahead and mark your cards.
Jan. 30: Callie is having a discussion with an action figure:
Wonder Woman: Callie, what's wrong?
Callie: I have a headache.
Wonder Woman: Oh, no! Do you want me to kiss it?
Callie: No, I'm just going to rest and watch "Real Housewives."
Feb. 13: "I need a paper towel. I spilled. I spilled on my shirt. I spilled! I'm dying a lot."
March 17: Callie's day care asked all the kids what they'd do if they found a pot of gold, then they put their answers up on a board. Callie's answer? "Ninja Turtles."
Some days, I'm very sure that my husband and I are the best parents in the world.
April 10: Callie is playing on our swing set with two new friends. And by friends, I mean rocks she found back there. They're taking turns on the slide and she just finished pushing them on the swings.
I can't decide if this is the best thing ever or a sign that someone needs a sibling.
April 17: Me: Callie, are you drinking my juice?
Callie: No, we're just sharing.
May 22: "Mommy, sometimes people get sick and die. It happens. Happens a lot. Bye."
June 14: Callie: My favorite mom is ... Miriam's mom!
Me: She is a very good mom.
Callie: She knows how to make food!
Me: I make food!
Callie: Mama, friends don't lie.
July 2: Callie called me from her weekend away with her grandparents to tell me about her boating excursion. (Spoiler alert: She got seasick and barfed.)
It was weird. We had a proper discussion. She's able to have a conversation now. She accurately relayed events as they happened. She asked me questions and answered my questions.
How did this happen? She just said her first word last week. And why is she so tall now?
July 21: Instead of saying "Oh, my goodness," Callie says "Oh, my darling."
Aug. 15: Callie: Why are we cleaning?
Me: I just like it. Do you like to clean?
She looks at me like I just told her I enjoy putting my head in the blender.
Callie: No. That's weird. Go watch TV.
Sept. 25: Callie has informed me that no one likes me because I'm a meanie head fart who smells like cheese butt with bunny doody face.
When she says it like that, it makes a lot of sense.
Oct. 10: Callie: You're gonna die.
Me: I'm gonna die? How?
Nov. 10: Callie told her teacher at day care: "My mom is always patient with me."
It's the biggest lie I've heard all day, but it's sweet that she said it.
Nov. 28: Callie is playing dolls. One of them just had quadruplets. Callie named them Licka, Caca, Jigglypuff and Stinkol.
So, if we someday give Callie a sibling, she is definitely not allowed to name it.
Dec. 9: Callie had her first Christmas program today. She did well for the singing part, but then got shy when Santa appeared. She held on to me as she softly whispered to him that she wants an umbrella.